PROGNOSTICATE!

PROGNOSTICATE!

(7.20 No.89 — 162 Baseball Poems 2015)

By Steve Hermanos
@HermanosSteve
http://www.SteveHermanos.com

A reader wants predictions,
Well, here are the standings right now:

NYY 50-41 .549 —
BAL 46-45 .505 4.0
TB 47-47 .500 4.5
TOR 47-47 .500 4.5
BOS 42-49 .462 8.0

KC 55-35 .611 —
MIN 50-42 .543 6.0
DET 45-46 .495 10.5
CLE 44-47 .484 11.5
CWS 42-48 .467 13.0

LAA 50-40 .556 —
HOU 51-43 .543 1.0
TEX 43-48 .473 7.5
OAK 43-51 .457 9.0
SEA 42-50 .457 9.0

WSH 49-41 .544 —
NYM 48-44 .522 2.0
ATL 43-39 .467 7.0
MIA 38-54 .413 12.0
PHI 32-62 .340 19.0

STL 58-34 .630 —
PIT 53-38 .582 4.5
CHC 49-41 .544 8.0
CIN 40-49 .449 16.5
MIL 41-52 .441 17.5

LAD 53-40 .570 —
SFG 49-43 .533 3.5
SD 43-49 .467 9.5
ARI 42-48 .467 9.5
COL 39-51 .433 12.5

By now,
July 20
(celebrating the day,
Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin,
For the first time,
Pranced on the Moon),
With 55.5% of the season’s games played out,
We know what we got,
The picture ain’t murky,
Some of it is ugly as heck;

Steve’s Law states
That a team can’t make up more than 5 games a month,
So you can be 5 out on Sept 1,
10 out on August 1,
15 out on July 1;

Now, July Moon Day,
We’ll say that’s 12 out;

But with our Wild Cards,
That means,
Every team is still alive,
But phorget the Philadelphians,
A franchise co-CEOed by Jim Carrey & Jeff Daniels,
Dumb & Dumber;

In the AL, right now,
playoff-bound:
NYY
KC
LAA
With MIN + HOU as Wild Card;
And yes, right now,
If any other team,
Even lowly Boston, Oakland, Seattle
Slaps a streak of 10, or goes 9-1,
They’ll near Wild Cardville;

Over in the NL,
Cut out garishly-painted Miami,
Colorado is gone into thin air,
Milwaukee’s shoelaces are tied together in a Gordian knot
Of sausage casings,
Leaving Cincinnati tipping off the ledge,
Arizona, losers of 6 straight, might win 6 straight,
And San Diego’s proving pre-season prognosticators all wrong,
But maybe, just maybe-might
let their talent shine in Ws;
Wash,
St. Loo,
The Dodgers,
Pit and the Cubs,
Would be in,
With the Giants one game out,
The Mets, two;

And as the summer wrings out
The losers,
In our zero-sum game,
We’ll be left,
With 10 playoff teams;
And the 500 other,
Major Leaguers,
Will go home losers,
With abundant spending money;

But what do I PREDICT?
BAL, KC, THE ANGELS,
MIN Vs. HOU in the Wild Card;
The Yanks’ plethora,
Of creaky bones,
Will crack;

WASH, ST. L., The Trolley Dodgers,
Pitts and The World Champ Giants;
The Cubs’ll fade;
But the Mets…
If they trade for a fine hitter…
Maybe the Mets;

Yes, apologies to those who desired
A straight answer;
much of the murk
of the season,
Remains;
Though St. Louis,
K.C.,
A Missouri World Series?

—end of poem

* * * * * * *

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